Grown in Grayson County, Texas

Pepper Heads

A club for people who grow peppers that hurt.

Founded by Ronnie. Established 2026. Not affiliated with the Pecker Heads.

Join the club Come to a meet-up
Warning: membership may cause sweating, crying, regret, and friendship.

What we do

We grow hot peppers. Then we eat them, trade the seeds, and argue about whose is hotter. That is the whole club.

Nobody here is a scientist. Ronnie drove a truck for 40 years and grows peppers that would make a scientist sit down. If you have a plant, a pot, or a windowsill, you qualify.

Meetings run about an hour. Half of it is talking. The other half is somebody finding out what a Carolina Reaper does.

Ranks

You climb the Scoville scale the same way you climb anything: one bad decision at a time. Heat shown in Scoville Heat Units (SHU).

  1. Bell Pepper

    0 SHU

    You came to watch. That's fine. Sit in the back and keep the milk cold.

  2. Jalapeño Junior

    2,500 to 8,000 SHU

    You showed up, ate one, and lived. You're in.

  3. Habanero Hombre

    100,000 to 350,000 SHU

    You grow your own. You've sweated through a shirt on purpose. You've said "it's not that bad" and meant it.

  4. Ghost Pepper Ghoul

    1,000,000 SHU

    You've cried in front of strangers and asked for another. People warn their kids about you.

  5. Reaper

    1,600,000+ SHU

    There is one Reaper. His name is Ronnie. You don't earn this rank. He hands it down when he's done with it.

Club rules

  1. Don't touch your eyes. You will forget this rule once. Nobody forgets it twice.
  2. Don't touch anything else either. Wash your hands. Then wash them again. Then think hard before the restroom.
  3. Milk is not weakness. Water makes it worse. We keep a gallon in the cooler and no one keeps score.
  4. Bring seeds. If your plant did something special this year, share it. That's how the club gets hotter.
  5. What burns in the club stays in the club. Nobody's face goes on the internet without their say-so.

Meet-ups

We meet once a month while the plants are producing. Bring a chair, a pepper, and something to drink that isn't water.

Next meet-up
Date to be announced
Where
Ronnie's back porch, until we outgrow it
Bring
Seeds to trade, a pepper you're proud of, and a gallon of milk if it's your first time

Join the club

No dues. No forms. No handshake, because see rule two.

Tell Ronnie you want in, and show up to a meet-up. Eat something. That's the whole application.

Tell Ronnie you're in